Ladies, if the engagement is broken off.do you get to keep THE EXPENSIVE ($3-10K) DIAMOND RING?
Or, do you return it back to the unbetrothed man?
If you DO keep it, it is considered as “income” according to Federal Income laws.
Have you ever declared a kept Diamond Engagement ring as “income” for tax purposes on your return?
(this question is prompted by a segment that just appeared on Fox News where their legal analyst, Liz Wiehl, clarified that an Engagement Ring (from a cancelled engagement) that is not returned but, kept by the bride-to-be because she claims it as being “given to her”, is “income” and should be declared on her tax return.)
A good point about who gets to keep the ring, depends on who of the two broke off the engagement.
@ Chastons Wifey
Very helpful and informative link.
@ mom of 2
Indeed, the ring is “just a symbol” but it still carries a large monetary value that must be (or, should be) reconciled…right?
(I see 22 Answers - thank you all for your very interesting, albeit varied, opinions).
Just to add mine…it’s always been my personal contention that, like many of you have said, the ring is a “promise” to marry, a conditional gift, and if things go awry where the wedding is called off, the ring goes back to the man who purchased it since the wedding is now null and void.
Too bad ALL the States cannot agree on one statute.
A good question: why would the girl want to keep the ring anyway?…except for some spiteful reason.
22. August 2008 at 6:14 am :
NO - the ring must be returned to the man. It is NOT a gift in the regular sense, but rather a symbol of the promise to marry.
23. August 2008 at 3:31 pm :
If the woman breaks off the engagement or if both parties breaks it off, then the ring should be returned to the male. If the male breaks if off, then the woman should keep the ring.
However, if two lesbians break off the engagement, who would get the ring? The Butch?
26. August 2008 at 12:02 pm :
If the bride-to-be called off the wedding, she should return it. If the groom called off the wedding, he should let her keep it. If in the event it was called of because of one being unfaithful, the unfaithful one must surrender the ring to the other.
29. August 2008 at 3:53 am :
It depends on which state you live. Each state differs from one another.
30. August 2008 at 5:45 am :
Unless stated otherwise the ring should be returned to the fiance. It makes sense that one would have to declare it if you are claiming it to be a gift. The IRS are making celebrities pay taxes on their goodie bags now and I would put an engagement ring in the same category as the little goodie bags stars get.
30. August 2008 at 9:25 pm :
If the woman is the one who breaks off the engagement, she must return the ring. If the man ends the engagement, the ring is considered to be a gift and she is not required to return it. I don’t know if it needs to be claimed on a tax return though; it does qualify as a gift, but I know that when a person receives a substantial “gift” of money (such as inheritance) it must be claimed on the tax return.
2. September 2008 at 2:22 am :
LOL…the tax return thing is nonsense unless some CPA says otherwise.
Who broke off the engagement? The other one gets the ring.
If that tax thing was real, then every woman who gets married or not has to consider it on her tax return.
The ring is just a symbol of a pending contract to marry.
4. September 2008 at 5:44 pm :
No. I would return the ring because if i do not accept the marriage proposal then i feel that it’s not right to keep the ring.
7. September 2008 at 12:29 am :
3-10K is not that substantial in the grand scheme of things. I dont think most people would even think to declare it on a tax return. The ring belongs to the person who did not break off the engagement.
9. September 2008 at 10:38 pm :
NO, you DO NOT keep the ring unless the GUY says you can.
Simple as that. An engagement ring is a PROMISE to be married. If the engagement is broken off you RETURN the ring to whoever bought it.
The ONLY times you keep the ring is if the guy says to keep it, or you get married and then divorced, or if he cheated on you. The cheater does NOT get the ring.
10. September 2008 at 6:51 pm :
No.
This has been debated a lot, but the fact remains that legally, the woman is obligated to return the ring if the engagement is broken. It’s a gift given with a contingency (the promise of marriage) and if the promise is broken, the ring must be returned.
The only exception to the rule is if the ring is given as a gift on a holiday (i.e., Christmas, birthday, etc.), in which case, it’s a gift and the man cannot claim any legal rights to it.
With that said, why would you WANT to keep it?
And I’ve never heard of having to declare a ring as taxable income. What’s next? Itemizing our iPods?
13. September 2008 at 7:26 pm :
This article is to help clear up matters regarding what to do with an engagement ring if the wedding is broken off. Although etiquette rules that an engagement ring should be given back when a wedding is called off regardless of who broke the engagement, the legal system says something else.
Some of the circumstances that determine if an engagement ring has to be returned include the state you live in, how you received the engagement ring, and who broke the engagement. (We are not including if you want to be evil or spiteful in this article)
Conditional Gift States
Many courts look at an engagement ring as a conditional gift that is given in contemplation of marriage. If there is no marriage, then the engagement ring needs to be returned.
Iowa
Kansas
Michigan
New Jersey
New Mexico
New York
Pennsylvania
Wisconsin
The courts also have held in these states that the reasoning for no-fault divorces holds for no-fault broken engagements so an engagement ring should always be returned regardless of who decided to call off the engagement.
Implied Conditional States
In these locales, if the guy breaks the engagement, he won’t get the ring back. If he doesn’t break the engagement, he can request its return.
California
Unconditional Gift States
Other courts have held the belief that an engagement ring is an unconditional gift and so it doesn’t need to be given back.
Montana
Family Heirloom Engagement Rings
If you are considering giving a family heirloom engagement ring, legal experts recommend having a prenuptial agreement that lists who will keep the engagement ring in the event of a break up.
Supreme Court’s findings
Just a few years ago, the Supreme Court of Pennsylvania stuck steadfastly to the no-fault reasoning and decreed that the donor should always get the engagement ring back even if the engagement is broken off, regardless of who broke it off or why. Lindh v. Surman, 742 A.2d 643 (Pa. 1999). Iowa, Kansas, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, and Wisconsin have the same rule.
Conclusion:
It keeps life simple if an engagement ring is returned to the man on condition of break up, regardless of fault. If the woman keeps the ring it will only bring back bad memories when she sees it. If she just throws it away it is an attempt to bring some type fo revenge to the man who originally bought it for her. If you have to return it girls, give the ring back and move on to finding the right guy and forget about the current one.
15. September 2008 at 12:37 pm :
Under the law, the engagement ring is generally treated as a gift. The elements of a legal gift are: (1) the gift-giver’s intent to give the item as a gift; (2) the gift-giver’s delivery of the gift to the recipient; and (3) the recipient’s acceptance of the gift. Gifts, of course, generally become the property of the recipient.
However…
The majority of courts consider an engagement ring to be a “conditional gift.” A conditional gift is one in which some future event must occur in order to finalize the gift. In most cases, courts consider the wedding itself to be the future event that must occur in order to finalize the gift of the engagement ring. If the wedding does not take place, if the engagement is broken, the gift does not get finalized, and thus the ring reverts back to the gift-giver. In other words, the ring must be returned.
Recipients often argue that the ring was given as a gift not in contemplation of marriage, but as something else, such as a token of love and affection, or as a memento of a romantic trip to the Caribbean. Others argue that the condition of the gift was not the wedding itself but the acceptance of the proposal. These arguments usually fail.
Courts are in disagreement as to whether “fault” should be taken into consideration when deciding who gets to keep the engagement ring. The majority of courts apply what is commonly referred to as the “fault-based rule.” Simply stated, if the man broke the engagement, the woman keeps the ring; if the woman called off the wedding, she must return the ring.
While at first glance this may seem fair, if you delve deeper, the logic does not always work. What if, for instance, the woman’s mother is actually the indirect cause of the break-up, though it is the man who officially calls off the ceremony? The courts simply cannot be asked to determine which grounds for breaking an engagement should be considered fault and which are justified.
Thus, there is a trend toward a “no-fault” approach. Simply stated, at the end of an engagement, the ring reverts to the gift-giver regardless of fault. In other words, she has to return the ring no matter what. New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, New Mexico, Wisconsin, Kansas, and Iowa all currently apply the no-fault approach.
I had a friend whose fiance broke off the engagement two weeks before the wedding! They ended up in court over the ring. My friend ended up winning the ring in the lawsuit, actually her parents did, to compensate for all of the wedding expenses (deposit for caterer, flowers, invitations that were already sent out, reception hall deposit, wedding dress & veil, etc.) paid out by them that were non-refundable.
Many people ask why a woman would want to keep the ring. Well, that’s a perfect example of why!
15. September 2008 at 1:49 pm :
I watched a court case about this. And I would keep it. My fiancee said he would let me keep it because in a way it is a gift. He gave it to you as a gift and also for your hand in marriage.
17. September 2008 at 10:04 pm :
I would return it, as it symbolizes a promise, and if I decided to back out of the marriage, I wouldn’t feel right about it anyway.
19. September 2008 at 2:36 am :
Well in my case, my mother would get the ring back since it is a family heirloom.
Whoever bought the ring gets it back rightfully.
19. September 2008 at 11:54 am :
If we go by moral and ethical standardss it is better to return the diamond even if you have not broken the engagement. Seein the diamond will bring back memories and do you wish to live by memories?
22. September 2008 at 7:09 am :
If the engagement is called off. The appropriate thing to do is return the ring. This is because the ring is a token of a commitment. If there is no longer that commitment……the ring goes back to giver.
25. September 2008 at 2:12 am :
I believe the ring should be returned. Even if he was the one who broke off the engagement, I wouldn’t want to keep it.
I didn’t know about the “income” part of it, but I think it would be pretty hard to prove.
27. September 2008 at 11:25 pm :
i thought that they man got to keep it unless he proposed on a holiday and the engagement ring was the present.
1. October 2008 at 6:58 am :
i say no… though i would want to!!!
… excepting the ring is a promise to marry… if you don’t full fill the promise then you forfeit the ring…. what if he breaks off the engagement?? i think the same still applies….. the promise is not full filled~
1. October 2008 at 8:08 pm :
I’ve always heard that it depends upon when the proposal happened. If the ring was given around a gift-giving holiday (birthday, valentine’s day, etc) then the ring is seen as a gift. If it is not around a holiday, it is seen as a verbal contract to marriage, so it depends on who is breaking the contract.
I don’t think I would want to keep it either way. It would just hurt too much, or if it were me that broke it off, I would feel horrible about keeping it.
4. October 2008 at 2:33 pm :
The ring is a gift on the condition the you wed each other. It does not matter who breaks it off.
7. October 2008 at 10:32 am :
Depends on who is at fault for the engagement being broken off. As far as “income” if its paid for Yes, if not and you have to finish paying for it yourself (some people do you know) then Hell No. But personally I said you keep it and never declare it as income because it was “given” to you not “earned” by you like income so, No.
9. October 2008 at 11:02 am :
My personal opinion is that in most cases the ring goes back, unless of course the guy says you can keep it. Like you and others have said, it’s a promise. A symbol and if what it stands for no longer exists then it should go back.
If however the guy was a creep and caused you emotional distress then you’ve EARNED the right to do with it what you please including throw it into the river.
11. October 2008 at 10:19 pm :
No. Legally, the engagement ring is consider a “conditional” gift. The condition is “marriage.” If there is no marriage, then the conditions of the ring are not satified. You need to return it. As far as federal income tax laws are concerned, even if you were allowed to keep it, you would not claim it. What you do need to do is stop watching TV.